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Sorry to keep you all waiting in suspense for so long.

The answer to the riddle in my last post is…..*drum roll please*….. Invisalign!

Yes, I am going to get braces. I’ve always wanted to "fix" my teeth, which involves both straightening them and whitening them. The entire process will be long, and expensive, and I won’t be able to afford to do it all right away. But if I could pick anything I’ve been the most self-conscious about my entire life, it would be my teeth. Starting at the tender age of, oh, 5? Kids can be cruel. I remember being on the bus, having the bus bully (oh was she a brute) throwing things at me (rocks, pieces of glass), and taunting me. I don’t remember ALL the things she would say to me (oh boy there was a lot), but I do remember her making fun of my teeth. Something to the effect of me not brushing them. Oh, and by the way, she was totally unoriginal. I had already heard that, oh FIVE HUNDRED MILLION TIMES from all the other snarkety kids in my class.

See, back when I was a wee tot, I had nice big ole’ yellow spots (the technical term is "mottling") on a backdrop of white and shiny teeth. And all children equate yellow teeth with not brushing teeth. Yes, it’s petty. And yes, I got over it. Especially the older I got, the more my peers matured, and the more yellow the rest of my teeth became. Camouflage, baby.

I actually had fluorosis, which, put simply, is a mottling of the teeth caused by ingesting too much fluoride (I won’t get into the whole fluoride conspiracy here, but it’s interesting. Kind of like the dairy conspiracy. Look it up! ). The crookedness, well, that’s just genetics, and luckily it’s mostly just my bottom row of teeth. Even more luckily, I don’t have an underbite. Heh.

But each time I get a new dentist, they like to remind me. They always like to point to this or that and go "you know, we can fix that." I’ve always sighed and said "someday" with that wistful far-off Scarlett O’Hara look. Someday when I actually have disposable income. But wait, will I ever want to "dispose" of my income?!?

Anyways, I was quoted for the "full" Invisalign, but my dentist told me that I might be lucky enough to be done sooner with the express treatment, in which case I would get a refund for the difference. My dental insurance covers $1500, and the full Invisalign was quoted at $4600, so I would be responsible for $3100.

I’m looking forward to straight teeth :)

I was originally interested in using pre-tax dollars to pay for the braces through a Health Savings Account (HSA) or a Flexible Spending Account (FSA), but I first had to learn what the difference was between the two, and which plan was better for my particular situation. More on that later. And by that I mean I will be covering the health plan I chose in GREAT DETAIL in my next post. I know you’re waiting on the edge of your seats for that one!

P.S. Please don’t give your kids fluoride treatments or fluorinated water before the age of four. They will thank you later.

P.P.S. According to Wikipedia, "In November 2006, the American Dental Association began recommending to parents that infants from 0 through 12 months of age should have their formula prepared with water that is fluoride-free, or contains low levels of fluoride to reduce the risk of fluorosis." I concur.

One Response to “The Long Awaited Answer…”

  1. Anonymous says:

    My beautiful girl, Good choice! I think that you will never regret getting your teeth straightened. That is one thing gma wishes she had done when she was younger. Now I will just live with it and be thankful for still having teeth to with were straight and white. Good luck honey, your Uncle Todd is finishing his straightening job with braces for a year. The clear ones didn’t quite straighten them. Love you, gma

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